Today is husband’s birthday. He is 28. He is, as mentioned above, the greatest guy ever. I love him. No, I adore him. He is everything I could ask for in a husband. He is my best friend. He is very perturbed about turning a year older. Think of it this way, sweetness…you *could* be 64. But I’d still love you. 
Oh geez…where have I been? Not near a computer, obviously. But that is a lie. Just not near wordpress.
The holidays have damn near killed me this year. Oh, the agony!! Last weekend, I finally decided that it would be beneficial for me to visit the doctor. I have a horrible sinus infection and a cough that wakes everyone in my house (you know, husband and dogs). I have antibiotics to take until Sunday and a cough medicine that doesn’t seem to help much.
Because of the antibiotics and cough meds, I was advised by both the doctor AND the pharmacist to cease all drunken operations until further notice (err, Sunday when the antibiotics are gone). And this is the reason for my near-death this holiday season.
What would normally be tolerable (after a few beers) from my inlaws (don’t get me wrong here…I LOVE my inlaws. They are GREAT!! They love me and we get along…BUT…they do have their issues, as does every family) turned into me leaving the room or laughing hysterically depending on the situation. There was a specific blender situation that sent me into a gasping-for-air laughing fit…and it apparently was only so funny to me. And I was to sober one.
I did have a wonderful Christmas. It was peaceful for the most part, aside from the normal nephew-gets-so-tired-from-getting-up-at-four-in-the-morning-that-he-throws-a-fit-and-won’t-take-a-nap deal, and I got heaps of gifts that I love! What more could I ask for?
The house is painted and beautifully clean!! I love it!! We finished the painting on Saturday and I cleaned like crazy on Sunday. What a great feeling of accomplishment I’ve gotten from getting that grueling task finished!
I’m just not into the blogging right now. I’m tired and sick and busy with friends and family. I will return to normal blogging after the holidays.
I hope you’ve all had a wonderful holiday and that you all have an exciting and hopeful New Year!! Here’s to 2008!! May it be better than 2007!
I suppose I wasn’t named Grace for a reason. If I were named Grace, it would be the most wonderful instance of irony that ever occurred.
This morning at work, I hit myself in the head with the bathroom door. Yes, you read that right. I hit myself in the head with the bathroom door.
I have done some interestingly stupid and clumsy things in my life, but this one just takes the cake. I was just trying to walk into the bathroom, opened the door and rammed it right into my head. No one else was near me. I really should pay more attention to what I’m doing.
I’ve been clumsy my entire life. A few weeks ago, I cut my thumb while trying to slice a PRE-SLICED bagel…it just wasn’t pre-sliced well enough. The job probably could’ve been done with a butter knife or a fork, but I just HAD to go with the fillet knife. Yes, fillet knife for bread.
A few weeks before that, I heard my cell phone ringing in the kitchen while I was in the bedroom. I came running through the living room, turned to run into the kitchen, tripped over my 100 pound dog (how did I not see him there?? He weighs 100 pounds and is solid black…) and fell face first into the island and landed on the floor…cell phone in hand. I did answer the call…even though I was almost crying.
And this one sticks out because it hurt so bad. A couple of years ago, the light in our garage burned out. We are lazy about that kind of thing, so we didn’t fix it until this happened: the garage was packed full of stuff because we were building tables for our living room. I was going to the car through the garage and didn’t have a garage door opener for some reason. I took mental inventory in the mostly-dark garage and then proceeded to push the button and run under the garage door. My mental inventory sucked and I fell down on a pile of wood. I mean I fell down HARD. I just laid there on the garage floor. Husband opened the door from the house, looked around in the dark, didn’t see me and shut the door. He didn’t even see me lying there…almost dead! I had bruises and pains for WEEKS from that one. But atleast I didn’t get stuck under the garage door!!
I am always stubbing my toes and running into things. At any given time, I could have 0 to 57 bruises on me…depending on how much I’ve been drinking and what I’ve been doing. I trip over my 100 pound and 65 pound solid black dogs very often…probably once a day. If there is ice on the ground, it will find me and make me fall down. Husband supervises all of my activities that include sharp or heavy (I’ll drop them on my feet) objects.
How do I get less clumsy? I’d like to think that it’s possible for me to lack a little LESS social grace. Any ideas? Anyone?
Seriously, will this cold NEVER go away?? Now I’m coughing my head off. Last week I was sure that I had strep throat or an ear infection…nope, just a cold. This week I feel like I have bronchitis, which may not be far off. My cough keeps getting deeper and deeper…and it hurts! I have been taking cold medicine to try and get better. I’ve also been taking my vitamins EVERY SINGLE DAY and eating good, healthy food. Okay, accept for Sunday.
Seriously, Christmas is just around the corner and:
* The house isn’t finished being painted.
* The Christmas shopping isn’t finished.
* The tree isn’t up…and neither are any other decorations.
* I haven’t baked one SINGLE Christmas cookie/treat.
* I haven’t wrapped any presents that I have bought.
* I don’t have step-dad’s birthday (on Friday) or Christmas gifts made yet.
Geez…I’m on a roll!! Guess what I’ll be doing this weekend? You got it…that list! Ugh. All I want to do is sleep. I’m tired of being sick!!
Seriously, will the snow PLEASE just go away? It was pretty for the first couple of days, but I’m sick of it now!!
And, last, but not least: Seriously, could I complain anymore? You have no idea…it’s just one of those days.
Happy Tuesday, all.
To you, charlie@aol.com, I know what I write. I do not need to be reminded. I also know that I am not perfect…and if you are, then why will you not reveal your identity?
See, this is the shit that takes the fun/therapy/whatever out of blogging…dumbass people who read your blog entries and then feel the need to use them to “catch you in a contradiction.” I know I’ve contradicted myself. I ALSO wrote, at one time or another, that life is one big contradiction. Did you read that one and commit it to memory, too? Do you not have better things to do?
When you decide that you’re finished taking the easy way out, let me know.
I have many friends who come to me and “bitch” about their relationships. I don’t mind it 99% of the time, but occasionally I hear these people saying the same things over and over and over and over and over…well, you get the idea…and they do not change anything to make a change. Remember, if you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always gotten. I am a good listener and I can sometimes give helpful advice…both of which I like to do. But now it’s my turn to bitch about relationships…
I know soooo many people, be it male or female, in the following situation: The responsible spouse does the bulk of the work (work=going to work and running the household) and the irresponsible spouse does whatever he/she wants whenever he/she wants. Last time I checked, that’s not the way it’s supposed to be. Or is it?
With so many people I know being in this situation, I’m beginning to wonder. Of course, I usually only hear one side of the story. In the rare occasion that I hear both sides, I end up agreeing with both sides because, well, nobody’s perfect. I hear from one side, “He never helps clean the house…” And from the other side, I hear, “Even when I help her she bitches because I don’t do it well enough…” We all have our flaws…but it is our will to coexist with others despite these flaws. And, unfortunately, those in which we choose to coexist (i.e. the one’s we are SUPPOSED to love) get the brunt of all of our flaws. (And, to the housecleaners, if you’re non-housecleaner helps clean the house, don’t tell him/her he/she’s doing it wrong or not good enough. It’s discouraging and he/she will NEVER help again.)
Being an adult comes with so many things that we aren’t told about when we’re young. We are not told that we will have to be role models for our children instead of their best friends. We are told that love is easy…and it is. But we aren’t told that marriage takes work. We aren’t told (nearly enough) that we will have to do things that we do not want to do because we must be responsible for ourselves and our children. And you say, “These are things that come naturally with age/having children. Everyone wants the very best for their children and will do everything possible to make that happen.” And I will beg to differ.
If I didn’t do things simply because I did not want to do them, here is how my life would be…I’d be jobless (hence, moneyless) and I’d live in a pigsty that would be condemned by the local Health Dept. Those are just the two big ones that I hate. If I had children, they’d never get punished or have to take a bath. And they wouldn’t have to go to school. I go to work and clean my house because I must. I will discipline and care for my children because it will turn them into responsible adults. I am an adult…and I am responsible for myself and any children I choose to bring into this world.
Coexistence also comes with a list a mile long that we aren’t told about. To find a mate that has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING that bothers you is a pipe dream. As much as none of us want to admit that, it just doesn’t happen. The trick is finding a mate that you love and care for IN SPITE of these things. That isn’t so difficult. And then help each other out. Be a team…and a GOOD one (not the Miami Dolphins…and trust me, I know some teams who run a close second to the Dolphins for worst team ever). This means if you are in a position to do the chores/work/do good things, do them!! If the garbage needs taking out, take it out. If the dishes need done, do them. If the ceiling needs painted, paint the effin’ ceiling!! Don’t say things like, “Well, that’s her job.” or “I did it last time.” Or, most importantly, “I don’t want to!! I’m a 2-year-old and I just don’t want to!!” (okay, no one says the 2-year-old line, but you get the point).
At the zoo, the zoo people put the bears in with the bears, the lions in with the lions, the monkeys in with the monkeys…and even the effin’ animals work things out!! When a human is in with a human, things should be able to be worked out. Even the monkeys know “there is no I in team.” I suppose we could all learn a thing or two at the zoo.
What do you think? How is your team doing this season?
I think this commercial should be shown everywhere on every public station in the whole world. It says so much with so few words…
Yes…I know. I’m a slacker blogger. Sorry, I’m busy. With what? Umm…er…uhh…stuff. Stop givin’ me the 3rd degree!!
The weekend was busy! Friday night I had scrapbooking night which turned into going to Cheeseburger in Paradise night. Yeah, we didn’t scrapbook at all. We’re all slacker scrappers. We have a handmade gift exchange that we are all a part of next weekend, so we’ve been busy making our gifts for that. And who has time for scrapping around Christmas? I know I don’t. If you do, kudos to you. You are a lucky person!
Saturday we did some Christmas shopping and went ice skating. I don’t know why I thought that I could do all of my shopping in one day. Of course, I didn’t get it done and just ended up disappointed when I found gifts for people that were either too expensive or were sold out of the size I needed. That sucks! I still have about half of my shopping to finish. The ice skating was fun. I just have to say that I have the least graceful nephew ever!! I am not surprised…I know his parents and how graceful they are!! (ha ha guys, I know you’ll read this!!) I fell one time and bruised my knee pretty badly. Husband fell once into the wall. My mom says he looked like a crash test dummy when he fell. I wish I would’ve seen it. Holly and her sister both fell down…or pushed each other down. One or the other. But two of the guys (Holly’s husband and his brother) didn’t fall at ALL!! This was their first time skating and they did well. We all had fun. (and were reminded that we are older now…falling down is much harder to recover from when you aren’t a kid.)
Sunday we went to Bloomington to visit our friends Aaron and Heidi and their son. Aaron A. also showed up with his daughter. It was great!! The old gang back together again!! (minus one killjoy…and none of us were upset that she wasn’t there…) We had a good time playing music and playing with the kids. Fun times.
The upcoming weekend is equally busy. We have to finish the shopping and finish the painting (that should’ve been done a week ago). I have to go shopping with step-dad to get mom’s gifts on Saturday. We are meeting up with an old friend for some beer one night. Sunday is the gift exchange. Geez!! I’m busy. When I write it all out, it seems like more.
I also still have to finish 2 collages for Christmas and one for a birthday on New Year’s Eve (no, not you, husband). Oh yeah…and we are going to see people on New Year’s Eve this year!! This will be the first year that we’ve seen friends on New Year’s Eve in about 3 years!! I’m super excited about that.
So, how busy are all of you, faithful readers?
So, as I reflect upon the week I’ve had, I realize that I’ve learned some things. It isn’t much that I didn’t already know…more of little reminders for the future. I haven’t had a particularly bad week. It’s just been a little strange for some reason. Here is my list of lessons for the week:
* If I ever have a job in which I am required to turn in a time card, TURN IN THE TIME CARD. This never ceases to amaze me. I would make DAMN sure that my time card was in the hands of the payroll clerk ON TIME, EVERY WEEK. It’s how you get paid, people!! Turn it in or get your check a week late!!
* Be prepared for endless clumsy jokes when I tell husband I want to do something crazy like go ice skating. Yes, I am clumsy. No, I don’t need a daily reminder of it. Geez, how have I lived this long, you know, being this clumsy? I’m sure I will survive.
* Next time I plan on painting the vast majority of the inside of a house, have a serious and detailed game plan…such as TAKE A FEW DAYS OFF WORK TO FINISH IT…you know, so ya don’t go home after work and paint ONE wall everyday. This is a huge hassle and very wasteful in the area of roller covers and paint tray liners. It also seems to be MORE time-consuming.
* Don’t EVER try to please everyone on my Christmas shopping list. This was a very ambitious one…and it just won’t ever happen. Someone will always be displeased or disappointed. I’ve decided to keep the vodka for myself as I will need it.
* If I plan to make very time-consuming dinner meals, do NOT do it the same week that I decide to paint the house. The fresh vegetables will go bad and dinner won’t be served until about 8pm…which is entirely too late in our household.
* Don’t neglect my other daily household chores because of said painting and cooking. It makes things much worse when I actually decide to clean the house.
* Remember that people drive as if the apocalypse is near when 3 inches of snow falls. It isn’t the end of the world, people. Snow does fall and life goes on. Keep your wits about you in the car…or don’t get into one at all.
* Don’t paint a house 3 weeks before Christmas.
* If my husband decides to direct anymore symphonies in his sleep, don’t just yell at him. He will not wake up. Smack him in the face touch him on the shoulder and he will stop. Plan on hearing aLOT of sleep-talking after the symphony is done. (there must have been a reception in the foyer afterwards.)
* Next year, have a Christmas party to help get in the spirit. And donate to more charities and give less expensive gifts.
So there. There’s what I’ve learned in the past 7 days. What have you all learned?
There is nothing like being put in my place by a liquor store. I guess I won’t be getting everyone socks after all. I must agree, vodka is a delightful gift.
And let this be a lesson to us all this holiday season. The ad is quoted, “…has a great selection that requires little or no thinking on your part.” Apparently the thought doesn’t have to count if you buy everyone booze. I think this is a great solution. All of my Christmas shopping woes are solved!!
Happy Wednesday, all!! And here’s wishing you a soused, loaded, inebriated, intoxicated, drunken Holiday!! (Now THAT oughtta make it bearable!)
